As part of our Play of the Day series Lady Parts Justice League will explore the key players Donald Trump has chosen to surround himself with: his advisors and the people being appointed to his cabinet, all of whom have a deep of history of being strongly anti-choice. The building of Sauron’s Army.

Ben Carson – Position in Sauron’s Army: Barrow-wight.

Ben Carson — the man Donald Trump has tapped to head the Department of Housing and Urban Development — has an assisted autobiography about him called Gifted Hands (and a movie of the same name described as “a treacly, plodding affair”). It’s called Gifted Hands because Carson is evidently a good surgeon. It’s not called Gifted Analytical Policy Mind or Guy Who Knows Anything or Cares At All About Urban Development because neither of those remotely describe Ben Carson.

The only place you could find someone less qualified to head our nation’s housing agency would be Donald Trump’s rolodex of recklessness. So why has Trump named this particular bumbler for this specific job? Several reasons including loyalty, cronyism, and the same reason your cat chases yarn. But mostly it’s because Carson reflects the core values of the trogs and trolls who comprise Trump’s base. And one of the most important of those is a nasty streak of anti-choice, anti-woman extremism.

The reasons Carson is on Team Trump (after Trump described him during the campaign as being like “a child molester” and “a sick puppy”) is clear when you read how the anti-abortion nutz-4-nutz site LifeNews describes his appointment: “President-elect Donald Trump has named another pro-life advocate to his Cabinet today, this time choosing pro-life physician Ben Carson…” They go on to use the term “pro-life” more than Donald Trump says “Amazing,” “Fantastic” and “Bigly” combined.  

Ben Carson is under no illusions about how crappy he will be at this job (and this is a man who is under A LOT of illusions— see his theories about the pyramids). When his name was floated for Health and Human Services (for which he is at least theoretically qualified) he said “Having me as a federal bureaucrat would be like a fish out of water, quite frankly.” His spokesman Armstrong Williams added “Dr. Carson feels he has no government experience, he’s never run a federal agency. The last thing he would want to do was take a position that could cripple the presidency.” (That doesn’t include taking the position of PRESIDENT, evidently, but you get the point.) Well now they seem to think that Carson is more likely to merely cripple the Department of Housing and Urban Development. So they’re going to strap him in the driver’s seat and put a brick on the accelerator.

Trump’s Cabinet is nothing but a Whitman’s sampler of assorted nuts meant to appeal to the mouth-breathers that support Trump. And Item #1 on the Trumpian checklist of necessary attributes is an unhealthy opposition to abortion rights. And that is THE ONLY qualification that Ben Carson has.