That is us banging our head against the keyboard. Sarah Pitlyk, an anti-abortion MANIAC who was deemed “not qualified” by the American Bar Association but “qualified enough, we guess, for our evil plan” by all Republican senators (besides Susan Collins, still don’t forgive you girl) is now a FEDERAL JUDGE FOR LIFE. And she’s also a… Lawyer For Life… ironic really.

And like, of course, she’s a member of the dreaded Federalist Society, the group we should all be scared of who widely misinterpreted the Federalist papers and then took that thesis to destroy the whole world and stack the courts with terrible conservative judges. Of COURSE she was special council for the Thomas More Society (not even the more famous THOMAS MOORE) which our writer Jaye McBride referred to as the anti-ACLU. 

BUT SHE ALSO CLERKED FOR BRETT KAVANAUGH!!! AHHHHHH!!!! And she wrote an article for the National Review defending him and saying that his anti-choice decisions are good interpretations of the law. Because of course she did, because we live in hell.

The group of powerful men who pull the strings of evil on society… suck, obviously. But do they have to be so EFFING OBVIOUS TOO!??

And WE DIDN’T EVEN GET TO THE BAD STUFF YET! Our friends at NARAL put this doc together of all the bad stuff she has done in the name of being anti-abortion, MISOGYNIST, and hateful… and it is 10 pages with like, a lot of combining things! READ IT HERE

But we’re gonna list the favorites cuz like, this lady is bad, but so MUCH WEIRDER BAD than like… any person should be. Like, she WENT to Yale and… started a Students For Life group. And that’s like the 100th most flop thing she’s ever done. 

She ALSO argued that contraceptives were “evil” and a “grave moral wrong.” Like, she is FULL GONE. 

And then in the Iowa 6-week ban case WE HAD TO READ THIS SENTENCE FROM HER CREW, that the ban “merely creates a window of opportunity for women to be vigilant in the exercise of their right to terminate a pregnancy…prior to the detection of a fetal heartbeat.” WHAT?? THIS IS SO INSANE! WE CAN’T EVEN THINK OF A JOKE FOR IT. Except to say that… ALMOST NO ONE knows they’re pregnant before 6 weeks. ARE WE JUST SUPPOSED TO GET ABORTIONS EVERY MONTH TO BE SAFE?

OK this one… really broke us. They’re all bad but… idk something about this… this bitch argued that stem cell research was bad because people on the fence of abortion might be SWAYED to get an abortion because they realized that stem cell research could help people. GIRL, WHAT? WHAT??????????? 

We can’t go on, it’s too dark. But read it all. She’s worked for everyone in Big Anti-Abortion, every dreaded name it seems like she’s defended, every type of group. And now she works in Missouri who’s last clinic is hanging on by a thread. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.