Well well well well well, it seems that USA Today has published quite a few opinion pieces about Roe v. Wade in honor of the ANNIVERSARY of Roe tomorrow (did you forget? You still have time to get her a card!). And some are REAL DOOZIES! 

So we’ve decided to focus on this one “Pro-life lawyer: I want abortion abolished, but direct challenges to Roe hurt our cause.” Oh yes, omg we love it. Now here is the thing that’s so good about these articles. These people always want to seem like the REASONABLE, NORMAL … people who want to deny rights to patients. But… you can’t fool anyone. Cuz you are backed by… literally the stupidest people in the world. And you will ALWAYS tell on yourself. LIKE HERE:

“The most extreme will be bills likely patterned after New York’s Reproductive Health Act, abolishing legal protections for virtually all viable unborn children — children who could be safely delivered and placed with adoptive families instead of aborted by mothers who reject them.”

This quote alone nullifies fucking everything you say after. I mean, we know, it’s a fact, there are NOOOOO arguments against it, that many mothers who WANT THEIR PREGNANCIES have to have abortions later in pregnancy after a fatal diagnosis. There is… again, literally no argument against that. This is dark but… pretty sure most parents don’t want to adopt a stillborn baby. So this writer INSTANTLY comes with a big ole anti-abortion LIE talking point. 

GETS WORSE!

“Every case we lose further entrenches the judicially created myth that abortion is a constitutional or, even worse, a human right.”

Oh yes, GOD FORBID we recognize the right to choose as a human right. GOD FORBID you be able to have any control over your reproductive organs. GOD FORBID babies be born into families that want and can afford to have them. 

“Every case we lose teaches our children that the powerful have a constitutional mandate to destroy those lives dependent upon them.”

HAHAHAHA my 5 year old was like “Mom as I was perusing the state legislation news, I happened upon another case affirming Roe. Must be the norm now.” And I wept.OK final note, GUESS HOW LONG UNTIL THEY COMPARE TO ABORTION TO SLAVERY!?!?!  

Actually with immense restraint it takes until the LAST THIRD for them to compare the righteous crusade of **checks notes** denying people body autonomy to… SLAVERY! The fuckkinggggg irony. 

Anyway we read this whole article because we were hoping to find the master anti-abortion plan for ending Roe and this person just offers like… doing more D&E bans. 

Honestly… just get bent, lady.