Look y’all, we’ve long been trying to say “cardiac pole” bill… in honor of Dr. Jen Gunter. And Lizz wants us to call them “two weeks after a missed period” bills, and for ease “8 week” or “6 week” or “they’re really just total bans” or “you have to get an abortion before you know you’re pregnant” bans all… work. We don’t really say “heartbeat” bill cuz it is NOT a heart then and it’s gross, cruel, INACCURATE anti-choice language.

But now we’re especially especially not gonna use it, after reading two Jezebel articles today. THE FIRST about how the anti-choicers are CONTROLLING THE NARRATIVE on these effing bills. Which, we knew, but… dammit it still stings. Cuz the stupidest fucking people in the world should NOT be controlling… anything. They have ABSOLUTELY no nuance and so they grab headlines and…. Eff that! That shouldn’t be allowed.

The second article is about a CERTAIN candidate for president who still wants the Hyde Amendment to exist. YIIIIKKES!

So as we wait on a Missouri judge to decide if the state GETS TO STILL HAVE LITERALLY JUST ONE ABORTION CLINIC… here’s a forever reminder to never compromise on language!