Here at LPJL we’ve made it our mission to #ExposeFakeClinics and we’ve done a lot of work in calling them out. Next year an important case about fake clinics is going to the Supreme Court. You can read about it here but what it basically boils down to is: California passed a law that said CPCs have to post signs that say that the state subsidizes abortion and contraceptives and also signs that say if they are a licensed medical facility. Apparently, that caused a lot of pearl-clutching at CPCs so to Washington we go. We’ll be on this story til the end (and then some), but for today we wanted to highlight a particularly stupid opinion piece that was published by US News and World Report.  Like most anti-choice things it attempts to sound reasonable but then instantly falls into hysteria about the “unborn.” But what’s particularly concerning about this one is just how many things it gets wrong, and ABOUT ITS OWN CAUSE! You can read it here or, better, you can read Lizz Winstead’s takedown of all it’s inanities below:

LIE #1  “The Supreme Court announced last week that it will consider whether the state of California can force pro-life, faith-inspired crisis pregnancy centers to promote abortion.”

Jeebus. They even lie kicking off what the Supreme Court case is about.

Actually, (there will be a lot of “actually-ing” as I tear this thing apart) SCOTUS decided to hear whether or not the First Amendment extends to a non-medical facility’s right to impersonate a medical facility, and use not-doctors dressed in lab coats to give inaccurate medical information to pregnant patients as a tactic to dissuade them from having an abortion.

LIE #2 Rather than supporting and promoting these “neighbor-helping-neighbor” efforts, pro-choice activists would like crisis pregnancy centers closed, or at least their energies hijacked to promote abortion instead.

Actually, we do not want tax dollars paying to keep these places operating, especially when the tax dollars are coming out of Medicaid and TANF, the very programs low-income families who are looking for support need. Also, contrary to this tedious exercise in word salad, what those of us who are pro choice are asking for is not “promoting” anything, but offering information about abortion services. Unlike these fake clinics who only promote their view of how pregnancy should go, regardless of a person’s circumstance, we would like the person coming to them to be the one deciding what is best for themselves.

LIE #3 Americans respond generously and without fanfare to their neighbors' sudden needs and crises. One crisis that exists across the country each day is the challenge of unexpected pregnancy. The solution most commonly offered is abortion.

The solution most commonly offered?!? It is offered because it is a solution that many people ask for.  It is a solution people will chose when they are not ready to start a family, or never want to start a family. Fun Fact: Some people have sex for fun, and not to have kids. Weird right?

LIE #4 Every year, state and local governments channel half a billion dollars to Planned Parenthood which in turn performs about half of all surgical abortions in the U.S. and over 80 percent of nonsurgical abortions.

Actually, independent abortion providers perform most of the abortions in the US. But the authors here site Planned Parenthood because it is another way they like to fudge words to make you think PP is using tax dollars to pay for abortion. (Which they should be able to, BUT THEY CAN’T).

I mean, look at how that sentence is framed. They make it sound like half a billion dollars goes to PP FOR abortions when in reality it’s all used for Medicaid patients to get wellness visits, pap smears and prenatal care. THINGS THESE CREEPY FAKE CLINICS DO NOT PROVIDE. You know what else they don’t tell you in this article? A big reason they want to defund PP is that in states where they already have defunded them, that money goes to funding these fake clinics, who, say it with me, PROVIDE. NO. MEDICAL. CARE.

Also, what is your point? That when patients come to Planned Parenthood seeking abortion, Planned Parenthood provides them? Good. This MAY be is the hottest of takes in this article.

LIE #5 While abortion is sold as a quick and easy fix, for many women, it is not the solution they seek. What they want instead is to welcome their child into the world.  

Who is “selling abortion?” No one has to. Pregnant people make decisions to have an abortions everyday. In fact one in four women make that decision in their lifetime, all on their on without any ad campaign, promotional materials or discount codes. They do it because they’ve DECIDED TO. Also, talking someone out of a medical service they want is not medical care.

LIE #6 Responding to the desire of these women, countless volunteers run to the rescue.

RESCUE??? OMG, are they comparing vulnerable pregnant people shelter dogs?

LIE #7 Staffed predominantly by women, over 2,000 crisis pregnancy centers in the U.S. offer alternatives to abortion such as assistance in enrolling in Medicaid for pregnancy and delivery care, training in basic skills, free diapers, baby food, formula and strollers, even parenting and spousal classes for couples.

Um, there are actually aprox. 4,000 CPCs in the U.S. How do you not know facts about your own effing cause??

Also, if having a child is the solution they seek- these fake clinics do nothing to help keep funded the government programs they recommend to pregnant people. They vote for politicians who cut the very help they are recommending! So they are signing them up for assistance that could very well not be there for them in a year or two. Hello, what’s up with that CHIP funding? And when they do offer diapers or a crib often there are strings attached, classes to take, or volunteering for hours at the fake clinic in order to receive help. Should we force poor folks, who may work 2 jobs to make ends meet, to volunteer for hours just to get a blanket and a box of diapers? That just seems so Christian…

LIE #8 Radiologists read ultrasounds, free of cost, of fetuses as young as three weeks post-conception.

It’s not a fetus until 8 weeks post-conception (the correct term is embryo) and you cannot see a embryo at 3 weeks unless you do a transvaginal ultrasound, because a 3-week-old embryo is the size of a sesame seed. Most of these places are not medical facilities so we’d be honestly… a little terrified if they were actually performing transvaginal ultrasounds, not to mention even a speck of dirt on the creepy unregulated ultrasound probe would be bigger than anything you’d detect at this point. I mean, if you’re gonna lie this big, maybe just do some googling of what is actually plausible.

LIE #9 These ultrasounds not only help plan the birth by dating the pregnancy, but also help the mother, and often the father, to connect emotionally to their child.

No one is asking you to be the connector, or the convincer. Also, there are countless reports of patients bringing CPC ultrasound images to a real clinic and the gestational age is way off. That means the patient was lied to or had an incompetent radiologist. You pick what is creepier. But what I find so disgusting is after going through this, then all the state mandated hoops, by the time a patient gets to a clinic that provides abortion, way too many are now too far along to receive the procedure. People end up in your quack CPC’s because they are either seeking prenatal care, seeking financial help after the baby is born, or they are seeking abortion. CPC’s PROVIDE NONE OF THESE THINGS.  

LIE #10 California's Reproductive FACT Act requires crisis pregnancy centers that are licensed to provide medical services hand out a notice that immediate and free or low-cost abortions are available nearby, with a phone number for inquiries.

The FACT Act is just one example of a troubling trend of states and cities attacking crisis pregnancy centers. Hawaii, for example, recently passed a law requiring medical and non-medical pregnancy centers to post a disclaimer that Hawaii has “family planning” programs, including abortion.

Why “family planning” in quotes?  It is a thing. #TeamPetty

LIE #11 Centers must, at a minimum, provide the website where women can find information on these services.

Doctors and nurses working at pregnancy centers in Illinois are being forced to promote abortion to their pregnant patients.

And the city of Baltimore has an ordinance that requires pregnancy centers to post signs stating they do not perform abortions.

Creating a law that says, “if you claim to be a medical facility that offers pregnancy counseling then you must tell the patient all of the medical options available” is not forcing you to promote abortion, it is forcing you give the facts about all the options a pregnant person may inquire about.

Also, the horror of having to let people know the truth instead of deceiving people until they come in so you can shame and stigmatize them if they are not seeking the outcome the CPC THINKS you should choose.

LIE #12 The one-sided nature of these laws is made clear by the fact that abortion clinics are not required to post signs informing their clients that they do not offer prenatal care, adoption services or other support for women who want to give birth to their children.

Um. Clinics that only provide abortion state that is what they provide. We. Provide. Abortion. Also, they gladly refer people who want to continue a pregnancy to get resources to help them do just that.  Differences being- a clinic that provides abortion doesn’t try to tell a woman what she wants or needs. Instead, a woman comes to their clinic and tells the clinic what she needs then the clinic provides it or refers them to someplace else. Triple also- there are many clinics that do provide abortion, prenatal care, and childbirth, so what is your point?

QUADRUPLE ALSO- Are you making up more lies that abortion providers lure you in pretending they will provide those things and then talk you into an abortion? Because that is NOT a thing.

LIE #13 To post a sign or inform women of where they can get an abortion may not seem like a big deal, but it is a huge deal for the people who volunteer at these centers.

Their mission is most definitely pro-life and they are motivated by their faith to help both the mother and child.  

Then post that front and center! Why is this hard? Y’all are sounding like St Peter denying Jesus. HERE, I MADE YOU ONE. MAKE A BILLBOARD LIKE THIS AND WE WILL GO AWAY:


LIE #14 Laws attacking crisis pregnancy centers violate the volunteer’s First Amendment rights by forcing them to promote abortion, not just in a general way, but in very specific ways, to the woman sitting in the waiting area or in front of them in a counseling session. In fact, for many volunteers, knowingly, even if begrudgingly, pointing a pregnant woman in the direction of the local abortion clinic has grave moral implications. Conditioning a volunteer's work on her violating her conscience leaves her with only two options: She can disobey the law or she can stop volunteering.


LIE #15 Mistakenly labeled as an attack on California's permissive abortion laws, NIFLA v. Becerra really involves whether the First Amendment protects the right of Americans to lend a hand to pregnant women in need. All this activism against the generous volunteer efforts of so many good-hearted Americans hinders their work and reduces assistance for pregnant women seeking help. Our laws should respect the different convictions that enlarge the hearts of our citizens and drive them to seek the good of their neighbors – after all, the American instinct to come to the aid of one another is an important part of what makes this country so great.

First things first CPCs are organizations, not kind old granny’s, so stop trying to make this sound like all your intentions are above board here! The first amendment is one of our country’s greatest innovations and you’re treating it like it means you just don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do and no one can ever get mad at your for your opinions. Here’s the deal, like we’ve said throughout this piece, go off into the sunset and “help” pregnant people who have actively decided to not have an abortion all you want. Honestly, please do. But if a person is still deciding, if they are looking for some safe options (one of them being abortion), then luring them in and promising a lot of things and then telling them they’re bad and irresponsible or praying on them and scaring them into having a baby, well, that’s actively cruel. At the end of the day the first amendment protects our right to say this and, honestly, your right to write this dumbass article. But what it doesn’t protect is active deception. The law is not making you say “I love abortion” (although we say that in the mirror every morning) it’s simply saying that you have to provide all the facts especially if you claim to be facilities that provide all the facts. That shouldn’t be so hard.